Name: Val
Number of children and ages: one boy, 9 months old ? L.
The languages your family uses: English and French
What motivated you to raise your child(ren) bilingually: I am from Switzerland and French is my first language; I want our children to learn/be familiar with both their parents? culture. My mother was bilingual French/Swiss-German but never taught us Swiss-German; I always regretted it.
{Val with her husband and son, L.}
How does the bilingualism work in your family (i.e., who speaks what language)?
My husband speaks English and I speak French; though I do not always speak French; I do switch from French to English.
When do you switch? How do you decide on what language to use and when?
I noticed that I do speak French to L. more easily and regularly when we are both home alone (I am a part-time stay at home mom). But I do always speak some French when my husband is around. I speak French when I feed him, change him, get him dressed, or bathe him, for instance. I noticed also that I often switch to English if there are people around; for some reasons I do not always feel comfortable speaking French when surrounded by English-speaking people (I don?t want to feel them excluded maybe?).
I do also discipline L. in English. My husband was raised with his mom saying ?not for baby? when there was something the kids were not supposed to do or go to? And I started using that expression too. I think that?s the reason why so far I have mostly been using English to discipline.
What are some of the challenges you?ve encountered?
For some reasons, I don?t find it easy to speak to L. in French when in public (sometimes), but mostly around family. As I mentioned before, I think I?m worried that it may be considered rude by others.
Also, because I?m the only French speaker around here (my family is still in Switzerland and I don?t have anybody to speak French with), I am used to speaking in English all the time. So sometimes English is actually the easy to-go-to language. It?s what I?m used to, what my husband speaks, what I?ve been thinking in, writing in and even dreaming in for the past couple of year. I never thought I?d ever say this, but when I?m really tired at the end of a long day, English is often easier to use.
Finally, I do struggle between both languages. I?ve been living in the States for the past 6 years. I?m pretty fluent, but I still have an accent and sometimes I?m not sure of a word, or my pronunciation is not perfect. I am fluent in French, but because I don?t practice it as much anymore, sometimes I have trouble getting back into it. And writing is even more difficult. So there are days when I feel like I don?t have a first language anymore and I?m just struggling with both languages. And I don?t want this to affect our children. I don?t want them to learn both languages partially, with mistakes and all.
{Val?s adorable son, L., reading a book in French}
What have been some of the rewards of raising a bilingual child?
L. does not speak yet, but he is starting to understand some things and responds to what is being said to him. It?s always rewarding when he reacts to what I tell him, whether it?s in French or English.
Also, recently I?ve started to notice that I will automatically (and unconsciously) use French more often ? which was not the case when L. was first born. And I really enjoy this. It feels like I finally have someone I can talk to in French! The funny thing is, sometimes I do answer my husband in French or use French words in the middle of a sentence in English. I did not use to do this before L.
What role does your extended family play in your decision and ability to raise a bilingual child?
My parents are very adamant that L. learns French. They live in Switzerland and I think they feel it?s a way for them to be close to him.
My mother-in-law is Hispanic. She did speak some Spanish to her kids, but never actually taught them the language. My husband and I talked about it and he mentions how he regretted that his mom did not really teach him Spanish. So it?s an encouragement for me.
What resources have you found useful?
So far, I?ve gotten some children music in French and also lots of children books in French. That?s what I?ve mostly been using with L. One day, I also hope to get a kindle fire or something similar. I?m hoping it would make access to French literature and French movies for kids easier (and eventually cheaper too).
What are some of your long-term goals?
I am going to homeschool our children, and I would like to homeschool them bilingual. I am not sure yet how I will handle things like math, science, or even history. But I know I want our homeschool to be both in English and French. I do think it will also be a great way to introduce our children to both our cultures (literature, history, arts, language, etc.)
What advice would you give a new parent starting the process?
I am a new parent, so I don?t have any advice to give? but I?d love to get some from others!
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Thank you, Val, for taking the time you tell us about your bilingual parenting approach! (It sounds a lot like mine, actually. If you have any tips and suggestions for Val (and for me), please leave them in the comments section below! Val mentioned getting a Kindle in order to have easier access to foreign language kids books. This is something I have been wondering about too and would love to hear from others out there: have you found online resources for foreign language children?s books or games or any particular apps (for phone or iPad) that you think useful? Please share! Thank you!
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Stay tuned for more profiles of bilingual parents this week and next and contact me if you?d like to be a part of the series with your family?s story! Check out more on bilingual parenting in the archives here.
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